Grass Valley Police Blotter vol. XXXXVIII

At 8:36 p.m., a caller from the 400 block of South Auburn Street reported a man known as "Cowboy Bill" was running in the street and talking loudly to himself. Police arrested the 71-year-old man on an outstanding warrant.

[Is this the end of the trail for Cowboy Bill?]

At 11:51 p.m., a man from the 100 block of Richardson Street reported a drunken man was causing trouble. Police contacted the caller, who was not listed on the apartment lease. The drunken man had permission to stay for the night and the caller said he would stop calling police.

[I'm not sure what happened here, but as long as our tax dollars aren't being used to support it any further.]

At 1:25 a.m., a man from a motel on the 400 block of South Auburn Street reported his belongings were in a woman's car and she would not give them back. She was in the motel parking lot with her vehicle running and a dog in her car. Police contacted the man and woman. They cited the man on suspicion of possession of less than an ounce of marijuana.
[Another case of the caller getting himself in trouble.]

At 11:28 a.m., a man was at the Sheriff's Office reporting his brother was using his identity.

[The question that springs immediately to my mind is, "Are they twins?"]

At 7:59 p.m., a caller from the 100 block of East Empire Street reported a man and a woman calling for help for the past 15 minutes. Officers contacted those looking for help and they were found searching for their dog. The pet was united with its owner.

[Was the dog's name "Help?"]

At 10:12 p.m., a caller from the 600 block of Kate Hayes Street reported a man fighting with his wife on the street and arguing about her having torn a phone out of a wall. Officers arrested the 50-year-old woman for removing a telephone line.

[My theory about this being a male-only crime is debunked at last.]

At 2:48 p.m., a man from the 10000 block of Granholm Lane reported medication sent to an address he previously lived at wasn't being returned to him by the new resident.

[And just try getting the online pharmacy to change your address.]

At 5:15 p.m., a woman from the 10000 block of Valley Drive reported her husband brought home a sandwich bag full of marijuana.

[And, what? Was that not on the shopping list?]

At 11:06 p.m., a woman from the 12000 block of Boundary Way reported that her boyfriend had knocked her around. She reported his name and then refused to give any further information, saying she made up the fight to get him into trouble. Officers contacted the parties involved, and booked the 45-year-old man into county jail for resisting arrest.

[I always wonder how somebody can get brought in with "resisting arrest" as the only charge.]

At 1:12 a.m., a caller from the 17000 block of Norlene Way reported an unknown subject pushing vehicles and other miscellaneous items into the road.

[Superman, what hath thou wrought?]

At 2:46 p.m., a caller from the 14000 block of Gas Canyon Road reported unknown subjects had entered the gates of a wastewater treatment facility. The subjects had thrown mud all over the building and it also appeared as if they attempted to hit golf balls into the water tanks. The caller said the incident occurred on Thursday and requested a log entry only.

[It has to be somebody making a music video.]

At 7:53 p.m., it was reported that a male subject was making repeated threatening phone calls to the Sheriff dispatch.

[That's efficiency, cutting out the middleman and just going straight to the police to make his threats.]

At 7:56 p.m., a caller from the 200 block of Broad Street reported juveniles breaking duct work on the roof of a Nevada City business. All the subjects were wearing Yankee baseball uniforms.

[I think there is a lesson here for all of us.]

At 7:40 a.m., a nurse called from the 600 block of Freeman Lane to report a man lying in a nearby field. The woman called back to say she was wrong and what she thought was a man was really a pile of concrete.

[If this woman takes my pulse, I am asking for a second opinion.]

At 12:25 p.m., a woman from the 100 block of McKnight Way called to report a middle-aged man with a goatee picked up her keys by mistake at a local laundromat. The woman wanted the incident recorded because she felt he was acting suspicious.

[A middle-aged man with a goatee, that is suspicious right there! Him and his so-called "mistake."]

Source: The Union (http://www.theunion.com/)