Grass Valley Police Blotter vol. XXXII

At 6:19 p.m, a caller from the 100 block of East Berryhill Drive reported a man in dark clothes and a cowboy hat talking to bushes and cars and behaving as though he was under the influence. Officers contacted the person, whose neighbor took him inside.

[Nice to see a neighbor helping out.]

At 9:36 p.m., a woman called from the 17000 block of Lower Colfax Road and reported she had received a $2,000 check with a letter telling her she has won a sweepstake. The check was supposed to cover the taxes. But the letter had an address from Canada, while the check had an address in Hawaii.

[And the check was signed by some guy from Nigeria.]

At 3:56 p.m., a caller reported a disoriented elderly man went missing. The caller was concerned the man would walk into traffic. A second person called to report the man was at a restaurant. The 80-year-old man was reunited with family members.

[Did he get to eat first?]

At 4:59 p.m., a caller from the 400 block of Searls Avenue reported two to four juveniles were shooting airsoft guns. Police were unable to locate the juveniles.

[No Xbox for these guys yet?]

At 8:16 p.m., police arrested a man at on Ridge Road for vehicle theft, possession of a BB gun and committing a felony while out on bail.

[Possession of a BB gun? Under what set of circumstances is that a crime?]

At 9:54 a.m., a caller from a parking lot on South Auburn Street reported a man with shaggy blond hair wearing a baggy T-shirt accused the post office of not getting his mail and saying he was going to shoot someone. The man was not carrying a weapon. Police checked the area extensively and were unable to locate the man.

[A few years back threatening to shoot somebody at the post office would have been met by a hail of fire... at least in the stand-up comic view of the world.]

At 11:53 a.m., a caller from the 100 block of Neal Street reported a man with a shaved head and tattoos was carrying clothes, staggering into traffic and talking to himself. Police advised the man to move on.

[I wonder at the random enforcement of the public drunkenness statute.]

At 10:09 a.m., a woman called from the 11000 block of Marjon Drive to report her son sold her vehicle for methamphetamine.

[That must have been tough to explain to mom.]

At 9:32 p.m., a caller from the 11000 block of Ridge Road reported five juveniles brought a truck full of snow to the high school to make a "snow run." A deputy made contact and the juveniles cleaned up the snow.

[It is snow. It will clean itself up give a bit of time.]

At 10:17 a.m., a caller from Scotts Flat Lake reported he was shot with an airsoft gun yesterday. The caller believed the shooter was joking and did not shoot out of anger. A deputy took a report for assault.

[It was an assault, but it was a happy, well meaning assault.]

At 9:39 p.m., police made contact with a man with a gas-powered scooter on the 200 block of Commercial Street. Police arrested the 42-year-old man for possession of Toluene - a chemical solvent - for the purpose of intoxication.

[Nice of the police blotter to explain Toluene to us.]

At 2:58 p.m., a caller from the 100 block of Neal Street reported a man was staggering into traffic and yelling at random people. Police made contact with the man and advised him to stay out of the street.

[If you talk to yourself, you had better move on, but if you yell at random people, you only have to stay out of the street?]

At 4:10 p.m., a caller from a coffee shop on the 700 block of Freeman Lane reported a man hit his son for purchasing coffee. The man and his son were gone when officers arrived.

[Was it a Starbuck's? Was the battery politically motivated?]

At 5:05 p.m., a caller from an apartment complex on the 300 block of Sutton Way reported marijuana smoke coming from an apartment. Police arrived and the tenant refused to allow them to enter.

[Um, they said "no" sir. Curses! Foiled again!]

At 12:16 a.m., a woman called to report a suspicious-looking tent in her neighbor's backyard

[What attributes make a tent suspicious?]

At 8:13 p.m., a caller from Plaza Drive near Sutton Way reported seeing flashlights shining from a wooded lot behind the apartments, along with the sound of someone being beaten. Police arrested a 42-year-old man for possession of toxic chemicals with the intention of inhaling and violation of probation.

[Was it toluene? And what were the sounds of somebody being beaten?]

At 10:42 p.m., a woman called from Colfax Avenue at South Auburn Street to report she was at a stoplight for 30 minutes and the light did not turn green. A check of the light showed a slow cycle, but it was still working.

[If it was thirty minutes, this was an amazing, almost Teutonic, display of obedience and patience.]

At 8:27 a.m., a man called from the 600 block of Minnie Street to say he was punched in the mouth by a guest of his. He did not want to make a report.

[He just called to keep everybody up to date I guess.]

At 2:30 p.m., a man from the 20000 block of Red Dog Road requested the Sheriff's Office remove a helicopter from his neighborhood before he shoots it down. The helicopter was a rental from a Sacramento company, and dispatchers did not know what its business was. A message was left for the caller.

[Personally, I think it would have been easier for the Sheriff's Office to remove the helicopter AFTER it had been shot down. I am interested in how the caller planned to go about his anti-aircraft business.]

Source: The Union (http://www.theunion.com/)