Thursday, December 21, 2006

Grass Valley Police Blotter vol. XXXIV

At 12:33 p.m. a California Highway Patrol officer reported a man in the turn out-area by Bear River Gas yelling at himself and making passersby nervous.

[Why didn't the CHP officer do something about it? I mean besides report it.]

At 12:40 p.m. a caller from 13000 block of Highway 49 reported receiving a call from an ex-employee who said if his check wasn't ready when he got there, "It's not going to be good."

[Depending on the state of the checking account, even if it is ready I assume there is still a chance it won't be good.]

At 2:48 p.m., a caller from Wolf Road reported an older white male with gray hair at the turnout by Best Gas yelling and jumping into traffic. The subject threw a cup at a vehicle as well.

[See, if the CHP officer had shown a little initiative we would have had one less cup-related incident this year on our highways.]

At 9:01 p.m., police in Auburn alerted local law enforcement to be on the lookout for a 19-year-old suicidal woman who threatened to jump off the Foresthill bridge.

[Well, you know where they could start looking....]

At 11:24 p.m., a caller from West Main Street reported two men were going in and out of traffic with something in their hands, perhaps baseball bats, pretending to hit vehicles. Police contacted the men and the items they were carrying were cardboard mailing tubes. No crime was committed.

[I always thought "go play in traffic" was a Vaudeville joke, but it seems to happen with alarming frequency in Grass Valley.]

At 8:31 a.m., a caller from the 100 block of Neal Street reported people from a homeless shelter were loitering. Police contacted four people.

At 10:38 a.m., a caller reported a person from a homeless shelter was loitering on Neal Street at Mill Street.

At 11:37 a.m., a caller from the 100 block of Neal Street reported a man and a woman were carrying backpacks and loitering. Police were unable to locate the loiterers.

At 12:17 p.m., a caller from the 100 block of Mill Street reported a person was smoking marijuana. Police were unable to locate the person.

[Turmoil at the corner of Mill and Neal Streets. By the way, when you're homeless, just about anything you do constitutes loitering.]

At 6:38 p.m., a caller from the 10000 block of Mystic Court reported someone got into her mailbox, ripped up her mail and left it all over the ground. The caller said there were other victims. A deputy took a report for petty theft.

[Petty theft? I am pretty sure that is a federal crime right there.]

At 4:40 p.m., a man called from Blackledge Road and Grey Goose Lane to report a bearded man in his 40s wearing two different colored shoes was walking in the bushes. He was holding a stick or a bat and appeared to be looking for something. Deputies were unable to locate the man.

[I am betting on a cardboard tube from some wrapping paper... and that he was looking for his bowling ball, going by the shoes.]

At 12:53 p.m., a caller from Nevada City Highway reported a man was trying to get money out of a coin machine at a car wash. Police were unable to locate the man.

[If this is anything like my life, the man probably first put some money into the coin machine in hopes of getting change.]

At 2:14 a.m., a man called from a fast food restaurant on Nevada City Highway to report he refused service to two men in a four-door Chevrolet Blazer and they threw unknown objects at a vehicle in the parking lot. Police contacted the caller, determined there was no damage to the vehicle and were unable to locate the Blazer.

[I wish I knew why he refused service. It was probably after closing time.]

At 3:55 a.m., a burglary alarm went off at a restaurant on the 11000 block of Nevada City Highway. Police responded and the drive-up window was open. Police took a report for burglary.

[Let me think on this one. I am betting on two men in a four-door Chevrolet Blazer.]

At 3:08 p.m., a caller from buck Mountain Road reported a person was sitting in the middle of the street in a purple Camaro. The car had stalled after spinning donuts.

[Again, if you're going to do donuts, learn how to get in, burn your rubber, and make your get away. Either that or stick to gravel. My grandmother could do donuts in her diesel Rabbit in gravel.]

Source: The Union (

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