Grass Valley Police Blotter vol. XXVII

At 8:16 p.m., a woman from the 800 block of Zion Street reported her neighbors were trying to break into her home, have sex with her, maim and kill her. She denied she had been drinking.

[The denial! That colors the whole entry.]

At 2:17 a.m., a caller from Carpenter Street in Grass Valley reported smoke that smelled funny was in the air. Police were unable to locate the source of the smell.

[Another police call for "funny smells." I wonder who gets assigned to follow these up?]

At 2:48 p.m., police arrested two people at a business on the 100 block of South Auburn Street. An 18-year-old woman was arrested for resisting arrest, obstructing or resisting a police officer and battery of a police officer, and an 18-year-old man was arrested for resisting arrest, false representation of identity to a peace officer, battery of a police officer and obstructing or resisting a police officer.

[I like when the list of charges are all around the actual arrest and no other crime is listed. To be resisting arrest, don't you have to be under arrest for something else?]

At 10:30 a.m., a caller from the 200 block of South School Street reported a man was undressing in front of a window. The caller said the building was condemned and no one was supposed to be there. Police made contact with the man, who said he was renting. Police would follow up.

[Wasn't this an episode of "Friends?"]

At 1:34 p.m., a caller reported a man, who was possibly homeless, loitering at the CHP building on the 900 block of Sutton Way.

[Calling the police to report somebody loitering outside of the police station....]

At 9:07 a.m., a caller from the 700 block of Zion Street reported a man and a woman were shoving and pushing each other. Officers stood by while the couple "worked it out."

[The police said they would "knock their heads together" if they didn't straighten up.]

At 10:33 a.m., a caller from South Auburn Street reported a person waving a blue bandana appeared to have been drinking and was making people feel very uncomfortable.
[Is he waving at me? That's just so weird. Call the police.]

At 11:39 a.m., a woman called from the 300 block of Miners Trail to report two men soliciting a new business made her feel uncomfortable. Police were unable to locate the men.

[Did the Mikes move on to a new business?]

At 12:23 p.m., a caller from Walsh Street reported a suspicious-looking man was going door-to-door.

[They are out in force.]

At 12:41 p.m., a caller from Carpenter Street reported a solicitor was in the area. Police made contact. There were six solicitors in town. Police spoke to the driver who would pick up the solicitors and leave town.

[I always thought running people out of town or dropping them at the city limits was just a cliche.]

At 5:08 p.m., a caller from the 14000 block of Oak Leaf Drive reported a girl was hitting herself in the head with her fists and striking other people in the residence. A deputy mediated the situation and everyone involved agreed the girl needed to go to counseling.

[But did she get the counseling she needed?]

At 12:54 a.m., a woman called from the 13000 Naomi Way to report her television just came on in the other room and channels were being changed.

[I want to know how this one played out. Wasn't this an episode of "The Twilight Zone?"]

At 4:31 p.m., a caller from the 100 block of Neal Street reported a monster truck with a 9-inch lift, 37-inch tires and a missing grill was taken by someone the caller knew. Police would follow up.

[Monster truck theft! How much would you bet that there was serious pride in the caller's voice as he announce the "9-inch lift" and the "37-inch tires?"]

At 6:20 a.m., a caller from a hotel on West Main Street reported a lost or stolen knife, approximately 11 inches long, with a fixed blade. One side of the knife read "Randall Made Orlando Florida," and the other side read "Thrasher."

[A hard day, first you lose your monster truck and then your knife....]

At 4:56 p.m., a man from the 20000 block of McDaniel Road reported he came home to find a skinny man with a goatee parked in a brown Chevrolet Tahoe backed up against the caller's deck. Other neighbors had advised the caller the same man had been driving in and out of their driveway. The caller was concerned the man was "casing" the houses in the area.

[Truck backed up against your deck? Well, he is either a typical contractor or a burglar who believes in publicity.]

At 8:06 p.m., a woman called to say she had called the Sacramento County Sheriff's Office to report she had a dream that Christine Wilson's body had been dumped into Pittsburgh Mine. A log entry was made.

[Eyes were rolled. Sighs were heard. Life went on.]

At 2 a.m., Grass Valley Police requested a deputy to assist with a possible marijuana grow that an arrestee just admitted to having during a traffic stop.

[Way to blurt out information. "Excuse me sir, where are you headed at this hour?" "Well, I was just headed home from the marijuana patch I have back up in the... uh... oh... hmmmm...."]

At 4:38 p.m., a caller from the 400 block of Broad Street reported an older man with a long beard who was extremely drunk picked up the caller's dog in the yard and walked off with the dog. When the caller confronted him, the bearded man dropped the dog and staggered away.

[You get those prospectors full of drink and they will make a pass at anything.]

At 3:56 p.m., a caller from the 14700 block of Gracie Road just outside of Nevada City reported seeing a juvenile drive a vehicle into an unnamed city park, light it on fire, take a video of the flaming vehicle and flee the scene.

[I checked the rest of the paper, but there were no reports for of flaming vehicles. I plan to go browse YouTube tonight.]

At 9:01 p.m., a caller from Pasquale Road reported shooting and hearing a man yelling "Where are you?" The caller said the subject just ran down the street wearing jeans and white tennis shoes.

[Times when you want to resist shouting out "Here!"]

Source: The Union (http://www.theunion.com/)