Grass Valley Police Blotter vol. LX

At 7:20 p.m., a woman called from the 100 block of Celesta Drive to report a man was smoking pot in a room he was renting from the caller. Police contacted the man and advised him not to smoke.

[That will just show him. I am sure that made the domestic situation a little more tense.]

At 9:58 p.m., a caller from the 200 block of Dorsey Drive reported a man with a skateboard approached the caller's mother in a strange way, then ran off when another person appeared. Police responded and would follow up with the suspect.

[Was it a silly walk? A look in his eye? The way he was holding the skateboard?]

At 1:53 p.m., police issued five parking citations in the Commercial Street parking lot.

[How did this get logged at the station? Somebody bragging?]

At 11:59 a.m., a caller from Sutton Way reported an older brown Ford Escort hit a red and white truck and left the scene. The caller located the victim who said maybe karma would get the driver of the Escort, then left.

[If they are driving an Escort, karma, instant or otherwise, is probably already at work. Either that, or the driver is an agent of karma.]

At 5:08 p.m., a caller from Maybert Road at the Canyon Creek bridge reported 10 juveniles were swimming in drinking water.

[It isn't drinking water yet if it is in the wild, is it?]

At 7:59 p.m., a caller from the 17000 block of Norlene Way reported receiving a letter in the mail from a credit card company denying credit to the caller's 11-year-old daughter.

[Well, when you haven't worked on building a good credit record, these things happen. My daughter received a pre-approved credit card application when she was only four.]

At 2:15 p.m., a man called from the 16000 block of Judith Court to report someone shined a flashlight into his car in May.

[The mind just boggles.]

At 7:15 p.m., a woman went into the police lobby with possible drugs belonging to her roommate. Police tested the substance, and it was not drugs.

[A baggie of flour maybe?]

At 9:48 a.m., a caller from the 15000 block of Tyler Foote Road said his brother had thrown a rock at him and was threatening to kill him.

[No big deal if the are, say, 7 and 9 years of age. Probably worth a check if they are in their forties.]

At 12:05 p.m., a caller from Highway 49 reported he was assaulted at an unknown address across from a business. The man said he was hit in the face by a subject who thought he was stealing dogs from the business.

[The fear of dog theft has gripped Nevada County and citizens are taking the law into their own hands.]

At 5:28 p.m., a caller from the 12000 block of Lost Lake Road reported the theft of two expensive bottles of wine from a residence.

[Because that is what people steal. Not your CD or DVD collection. Not your expensive electronics. No, somebody will be at the flea market this weekend trying to pawn off some fine wine to which they do not have legal title.]

At 1:02 p.m., a caller front he 100 block of Ophir Street reported when she came home from lunch it appeared someone had been on the back deck because some plants were knocked over, and her cat with kittens looked afraid.

[Hey, Sherlock Holmes, have you ever heard of raccoons? Or squirrels? Or did the look in momma cat's eyes just scream "humans!" at you?]

At 4:46 p.m. Wednesday, all fire departments were notified that the off-ramp at Highway 49 and Idaho-Maryland Road was on fire. When crews reached the scene, they discovered the smoke was from a cigarette.

[Well, I suppose that was something of a relief, even if it was a big waste of time.]

Source: The Union (http://www.theunion.com/)