Grass Valley Police Blotter vol. XCIII

1:34 a.m. - A woman called from the 18000 block of Biladeau Lane to report being threatened and harassed by her mother over religious issues.

[No doubt mom was indicating where she thought her daughter would end up given her current behavior.]

11:08 a.m. - A caller from a business on the 24100 block of Dark Horse Drive reported all the beer had been stolen.

[Not just "beer," but "all the beer!" A sad day for somebody.]

4 p.m. - A caller from the 17900 block of Highway 49 said someone opened her locked door with a butter knife while she was away.

[There is something about "butter knife" that makes this all the more humiliating.]

10:04 a.m. - A caller from the 12000 block of Lakeshore Drive reported two ceramic pieces were stolen from her home.

[Garden gnome theft?]

7:52 a.m. - A caller from King Court reported a neighbor's house was flooding, and water was coming out of it.

[The mental image is probably better than the reality. I wonder if it was a burst water bed?]

9:12 a.m. - A caller from a parking lot on the 700 block of Freeman Lane reported a man punched his silver Buick, denting it, and then drove away.

[Ouch? Aren't those made out of steel or something? They used to be when I was a kid.]

1:13 a.m. - Officers arrested a 33-year-old man on the 15000 block of Tyler Foote Road on suspicion of threatening a crime, willfully following and harassing another person, possessing certain weapons, carrying a concealed dagger, evading a peace officer while operating a vehicle and driving under the influence of alcohol or drugs.

[Just another fun Saturday night!]

3:08 p.m. - A caller from the 10000 of Bragg Avenue reported finding a Bowie knife in some bushes. The caller didn't know who owns the knife.

[That is a pretty sizable find. A real Bowie knife is not generally a small item.]

Source: The Union (http://www.theunion.com/)